My Letter to Bank of America.

Posted in the Comments & Suggestions portion of their website

Seriously, guys. $35 is a bit much for an overdraft fee. That cup of coffee was not worth $38. The idea is to keep your customers, especially at a time when you need them more than they need you. But please, when they plead with you, when they throw themselves shamelessly at your mercy (Google it), when they ask for your help and leniency, stand your ground, repeat the same phrase as many times as necessary, turn your nose up and assure them that it's actually a "courtesy" the bank provides to what should be grateful customers. Oh, I'm sorry- did I upset you with my rational argument? Did I sew a seed of doubt, plaguing your faith in the system? Did I simply ask for too much? "MORE?" It's Dickens. Wasted reference, I know. This one might be more familiar: When you think of yourself, Bank of America, realize that I was the old woman at the door, begging you for shelter, and that you were the arrogant prince that refused to help, and now look at you- you're a beast! I wonder if you would have felt similar if the government had simply said "It's your fault: I'm afraid we can't help." amidst the bailout. So here's what I'm going to do: I'm going to use my entire paycheck to cover all the fees caused by fees, and then I'm closing my account forever. When inevitably the announcement comes that BOA is bankrupt and Uncle Sam has no more money for you and you're all losing your jobs and you feel like the whole world's laughing at you, remember me- my laugh will be the first.